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Mennonite Life

Mennonite Woman Wins National Curling Championship

March 1, 2021 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Mary Dueck, 58, of La Crete, Alberta has taken home the 2021 Canadian Women’s Curling Championship by successfully leaving a set of ten pink plastic rollers on her head for a record six […]

The Outside World

NHL Says 11 Players Have Tested Positive for Mullets

June 19, 2020 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY The 2020 NHL season is in grave doubt this week after the league announced that 11 players have already tested positive for mullets. “After reopening arenas and practice facilities on June 8, […]

Mennonite Life

Mennonite Woman Claims to be Man to Get Cheaper Haircut

December 5, 2019 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Taunte Lina waltzed into her local Snips ‘n Go salon this past Tuesday for her weekly haircut, only this time things were a little different when she went to the till to pay. […]

Church

Visitor to Mennonite Church Blinded By All the Blond Hair

November 3, 2017 Andrew

BLUMENHOF, MB Winnipeg resident Angela Ricci, 28, was rushed to the hospital this past Sunday after being temporarily blinded by the overabundance of blond hair at Blumenhof Mennonite Church. “That volume of blond hair can […]

The Outside World

Burton Cummings to Donate His Moustache to Charity

October 1, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Legendary Canadian rocker Burton Cummings is set to become a little bit lighter this weekend after agreeing to shave his signature moustache and auction it off for charity. “We’re thinking his moustache could […]

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Mannanite News Yet!

  • All Steinbach Bars to Be Annexed By Neighbouring Municipality
    October 6, 2016
  • Dishes are Miraculously Washed as Mennonite Man Naps on Sunday Afternoon
    February 18, 2018
  • Man Consoles Himself With Gospel Music as Team Loses
    November 27, 2016
  • Rainy Day Equals Free Car Wash for Mennonite Man
    March 25, 2021
  • Maxime Bernier Attracts Just Barely Enough Supporters to Get Himself Arrested
    June 11, 2021
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