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Mennonite Life

10 Amazing Facts About Mennonites According to the 2021 Census

February 12, 2022 Andrew

Statistics Canada has just released the results of the 2021 census and there are many startling revelations about the country’s Mennonite population. Let’s have a look! Average Mennonite net worth: 73 acres of flax and […]

Mennonite Life

Anthropologists Shocked! Russian Mennonites aren’t really Russian and Pennsylvania Dutch aren’t really Dutch

November 7, 2019 Andrew

WELLINGTON, NEW ZEALAND Anthropological researchers from the University of New Zealand have recently made a shocking discovery about two prominent groups of Mennonites, the so-called Russians and the Pennsylvania Dutch. “Neither one of them are […]

Food and Drink

Ten Authentic Mennonite Dishes to Make for Mennonite Heritage Week

September 8, 2019 Andrew

It’s finally here! Mennonite Heritage Week! A time to sit back and reflect on everything that it means to be Mennonite. While you’re arguing in the church lobby about the nuances of being a pacifist […]

Mennonite Life

Five Controversial Topics You Can’t Joke About With Mennonites

March 31, 2018 Andrew

Believe it or not, Mennonites like to laugh, it’s just that our list of laugh-worthy topics is more limited than others. In other words we have more taboo subjects than most. Writing Mennonite satire has […]

Mennonite Life

Mennonite Town Eagerly Anticipates Spanish Man’s Arrival

April 9, 2017 Andrew

STRASSBURG, MB Members of a tiny church in Strassburg, Manitoba have been laying out palm branches on the street in anticipation of the arrival of Winnipeg resident and estate lawyer Jesus Hernandez. “I can’t believe Jesus […]

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Mannanite News Yet!

  • Mennonite Woman Spends Six Hours Looking for the Right Tupperware Lid
    September 23, 2021
  • Mennonite Man Pays Even Less in Taxes than Donald Trump
    September 29, 2020
  • Affluent Attention-Starved Couple Lodges Complaint Against Pastor for Not Visiting them as Often as Actual People in Need
    July 13, 2019
  • Mennonite Man Lives the Exact Same Day Over and Over and Over
    February 2, 2017
  • Canadian Woman Turns to Pillar of Salt After Failing to Apply Adequate Levels of Moisturizer
    November 23, 2018
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