Pastor Pete of North Southside Mennonite has graciously decided to shorten his sermons to a more tolerable 90 to 120 minutes for the summer months.
“Hey, I know how it is in the summer months,” said Pastor Pete. “The weather’s nice, the patios are open, people want to get out there and throw back a few Old Style Pilsners. No one wants to listen to the usual two to three hour sermon. I figured I’d give the people a break.”
Pastor Pete began his first summer sermon by reading very slowly and clearly the entire book of Leviticus.
“I’ve also decided to turn off the air-conditioning,” said Pastor Pete. “That way people will stay away during my verse by verse exegesis of Leviticus chapters 1 through 16.”
Pastor Pete is also leaving time for seventy minute “children’s time” where he’ll be calling up all the kids to the front and reading them some riveting chapters from Pilgrim’s Progress.
“This is going to be a summer to remember!” said Pastor Pete. “You’re not going to want to go to the lake every weekend this summer.”