Mennonite Man Breaks Five Teeth on Oma’s Rock Hard Papanat


Local man Dick Brandt underwent emergency dental surgery this week after cracking four molars and an incisor on Oma Brandt’s notorious rock hard päpanät.

“Diewel, Oma’s päpanät are hard yet,” exclaimed Mr. Brandt, spewing bits of teeth and cookies across the room. “Jauma Lied, oma! Be a little gentler next time!”

The search was on to find Mr. Brandt’s teeth. Eventually the debris was discovered next to the record player and a collection of Barry Moore albums.

“It doesn’t look like we’ll be able to reuse them,” said a local dentist. “The odds of surviving a päpanät attack like this are very slim.”

As for Mr. Brandt, he is now undergoing surgery to restore his handsome smile.

“Next time I’m sticking to pfeffernusse,” said Mr. Brandt, apparently unaware that it was exactly the same thing. “I’ve never lost a tooth on one of those.”

(photo credit: Darin McClure/CC)

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