WINNIPEG, MB
For some strange reason, an area man who received just 27% of the vote last night is under the impression that he’s the new mayor of Winnipeg.
“I’d like to thank the literally dozens and dozens of voters who came out and voted for me,” said a man named Scott Gillingham. “It warms the cockles of my heart to see the overwhelming support I have from about a quarter of the city’s population.”
A number of signs at city hall have already been altered to include the new mayor’s name, although only the first 27% of the letters, which works out to about S-C-O-T, will be changed.
“They also told me I could have about 27% of an office and 27% of a parking space,” said Gillingham. “It’s not ideal, but I’ve been looking into one of those Smart cars anyway.”
For some strange reason, the 73% of voters who didn’t vote for the current mayor seemed totally unperturbed by GIllingham’s presence at city hall.
“Them’s the breaks,” said candidate Glen Murray. “If only I’d campaigned a little harder, maybe I could have got 72, 71, or even 70 percent of voters not to vote for someone other than me.”
Meanwhile, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is looking closely at the Winnipeg election and trying to figure out how he, too, can get elected with 27% of the vote.
