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Month: May 2021

The Outside World

Montrealers Just Don’t Take Cops Seriously Anymore After Decades of ‘Just for Laughs’ Gags

May 31, 2021 Andrew

MONTREAL, QC Residents of Canada’s second largest city simply do not take cops seriously anymore after decades of the popular TV show Just pour rire: Les Gags. Mr. Tremblay, for example, was pulled over for going […]

Church

Mennonite Man Accidentally Speaks Plautdietsch on a Sunday

May 30, 2021 Andrew

CUAUHTEMOC, MEXICO Mr. Wiebe, 41, was so enraptured in a conversation after church this Sunday that he hardly even noticed he was speaking Plautdietsch rather than the Lord’s language of High German. “Oba, waut de […]

The Outside World

Cult Leader Really Hoping to be Arrested on Live TV

May 29, 2021 Andrew

DOMMHEIT, MB Cult leaders across Canada have been doing everything they can to get themselves arrested on live television. “I’m stalling until the TV crews get here,” said Dommheit cult leader Pastor Timmy Thiessen. “This […]

Mennonite Life

Local Author Stays Covid Safe with Ingenious Stick and Pen Combo

May 28, 2021 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Unable to host any in-person book signings since his novel Once Removed was released, local author Andrew Unger has created an ingenious new invention that should solve the problem. “People will finally start […]

Food and Drink

Mennonite Pitcher Throws No-Hitter While High on Yerba Mate

May 27, 2021 Andrew

MONTREAL, QC It was fifty years ago today that Pieta Ens, rookie phenom for the Montreal Axpos, threw a complete game no-hitter while high on what many believe was yerba mate. “His demeanor was erratic, […]

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Mannanite News Yet!

  • “I Thought it Said ‘Make Altona Great Again'” says MP
    January 9, 2021
  • Oma Wiebe Really Excited About Altona’s New Pot Shop
    March 24, 2019
  • Controversial Politician Supports Mandatory Vacations
    September 18, 2021
  • Mennonite Woman Calls Her Coffee Break a ‘Menno Pause’
    June 29, 2019
  • Santa’s Complete List of Naughty Mennonites
    December 23, 2017
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